You Love Who You Love
by McEvoyer
Summary: Olicity. Oliver eventually lays his heart on the line and tells Felicity exactly what she means to him. Set mid-season 3 (maybe).


**Hey there! This drabble just popped into my head last night and I just had to write it down - hope you like what you read :)**

**Alas, I do not own Arrow.**

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The words just exploded out of him without any warning, taking both him and her off-guard.

"It's not unthinkable."

His voice wavered just enough to be noticed, cracking a little at the end. In realization, his eyes fluttered closed, calming the bounding agitation enough so that he could root himself to the spot. No going back now. No going back ever again.

"What?" she asked over her shoulder, only mildly paying attention to him. Her sole focus was whatever was on the screen.

Head slightly shaking in amusement at how bad his timing was, he cleared his throat and prayed to whatever deity that was out there to cut him some slack. "You and me."

Just like that, the foundry fell dead; the light patter of tapping keys stilling completely and the whirring of the system diluting to a harmonious hum. Shoulders tense, Felicity straightened in her seat.

His eyes remained fixed on the back of her head, a heavy exhale sagging from him.

Oliver knew the words had been floating around his brain ever since that day on the beach where their hearts were opened for the briefest of instances, but he never thought there'd be a right time for them to be expressed, for them to escape from the only sliver of peace his soul entertained. But it was as though they had been clawing and clawing through him for months, each day getting closer and closer to the surface. And he surprised himself with how easily they slipped off his tongue, how causally they punctuated the air like they didn't hold any weight.

Clearly they were never supposed to be for him only.

After what felt like forever, eventually, and achingly slowly, the blonde swivelled around to face him. Her expression was blank but her depths were drowning in questions, head ever so slightly tilted to the side in what he could only decipher as a challenge.

He continued; all of a sudden, the compulsion to let it all out was far too powerful. Looking at her, being around her, knowing her, loving her from afar – he couldn't keep denying the truth. Not anymore. "We never were. At least _I_ knew we never were. The moment I met you…" blue then met blue, vulnerability exposed in its purest form, "…it was just like I had found a piece of me that I thought was lost forever." She gulped and rolled her lips in, bracing her hands on the armrests of her chair. "Did I ever tell you that you were the first person to make me smile since I came back from the island?" he laughed once, remembering it like it was yesterday and finding a warmth in the way her features softened immensely at the confession. "I'd been playing the part of Oliver Queen for weeks: forcing laughter, faking smiles, hiding what I went through, hiding what I was doing every night…not once did I feel like myself. It was like nothing – not even my mother or Thea – could break through this…" he waved a hand up and down in front of him, "…wall I'd put up. And then I met you."

The blonde inhaled sharply, orbs studying him intently, cheeks starting to redden with emotion.

Oliver ambled toward her, chest loosening as if finally freeing itself from its chains. "You…" he shook his head, searching for way to tell her _everything_, "I don't even know how to describe what happened but you…you cracked the wall. Somehow you didn't see the Oliver that everyone else did; you saw _me_. And you didn't buy into my terrible lies - which was refreshing to say the least." He smiled, feeling so much lighter. "Felicity, with you, I knew that I didn't really have to be anybody else. I didn't have to play a part. I know I tried to at times but I always knew that you could see right through that playboy, rich kid façade-"

"You're not that great of an actor," she interjected quietly, lips quirking ever so much.

"So I found out," he retorted playfully as he reached out and covered one of her hands that still held onto the armrest as if it was her lifeline. A flash of fire sparked up his arm at the touch and he knew by the way her eyes darted to his that she felt it too. "Felicity," he whispered, "I knew from the moment I met you that I could trust you. That alone meant so much. It still does. You honestly have no idea how much you've impacted my life and…and you'll never understand what you mean to me. Because I don't think I'll ever be able to fathom it myself. That's why it scares me, you know?" Images from their date months ago clouded his mind but one in particular stuck out, making his heart ache: Felicity lying bloodied and unconscious on the med table. A familiar pang of guilt rocketed thorough his frame. Yet just as soon as it appeared, Oliver shook his head to keep his focus straight. He couldn't continue to let fear ruin the only part of his life that made him happy. He just couldn't. "I'm - I'm not used to having someone that important to me. And I want, I _need, _you to realize that you're more important to me than you'll ever know. Never question that. You're my partner. My best friend." He took a deep breath, leaning down to brush her forehead with his. "The woman I love."

"Oliver-"

"So you were wrong on that beach, because you and I are the _most_ thinkable thing I have ever known. _You_ are who I love and no matter how many times I try to push you away because I'm afraid, that's the one thing that stays the same. It's you. It's always been you and it will always _be_ you. You're everything that I want, Felicity Smoak. That's all I ever need to know."

A single tear fell from her eye, a frown etched into her brow. "But what about what we decided? Back then we both knew it wasn't the right time, that the team and the city had to come first and that we needed to wait until we were both sure we could do it…?"

He allowed himself a small smile. "I think we've always been able to do it; we've always worked better together than apart. It was always a matter of whether we were ready. And I just think it's time that we give ourselves the chance to be happy. I don't want to be around you every day and not kiss you, to not be the one to greet you in the morning and go home with you at night. I don't want to wait anymore, Felicity. I think we've waited long enough…don't you?"

By the way she kissed him, he knew the answer to that question.

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**So I wrote that super quickly so if it makes no sense or reads terribly I'm sorry! Haha but I do hope you like what you read :) Please drop me a review and let me know what you thought - they make my day and offer so much motivation! **


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